Integration

May. 4th, 2024 08:34 am
lostianvs: AI-generated forest river. (Default)
Integration

copernicus

Self-development wasn't necessarily my intention when I started this project. I wanted to explore the manifestation of hidden powers within the natural world. I did not expect to spend so much time reflecting on the meanings of words and their influence in my life. In retrospect, it's no surprise that I reached this point. Part of my magical training has involved learning to read my natal chart. It's not a coincidence that pursuing these last three natural magic talismans (Mars, Jupiter, and Saturn) has had a profound effect on me.

I've found that "ascending" the planets in the way that I have has revealed an insidious lie. In my commentary on natural magic, I mentioned seeing hidden power as underlying reality, rather than "above" it. Models like the Qabalistic Tree of Life or the Heavenly Spheres make it seem like planetary energies are falling like rain on the Earth. This has not been my experience. As I expand my awareness to more planets, I get a sense of depth and encapsulation.

I first noticed this sometime after completing the solar and venusian talismans. Venus and Mercury seemed like two sides of the same coin. I later discovered Hermaphroditus, the divine offspring of Aphrodite and Hermes. This deity's cult involved practices where men and women literally exchanged clothing. It's interesting how much of our expectations of gender can be shaped by our cultural perspective. These notions of perspective and coin faces resonated with my understanding of Luna as pure "perception." From the vantage point of the sun, the lines between mercurial trickery, venusian expression, and lunar revelation became blurry. In a way, the three subsolar "planets" and the Terrestrial realm make up four-fifths of the Sun itself (as opposed to residing in some space "below" it).

I feel this pattern of integration re-initiating with Mars. Building an empire requires two regents (reagents?): destruction and cultivation. I embraced the Athenian aspects of Mars with the Talisman of Discipline, but that's not the full story. The heavy stone I found on my last journey has incredible potential for an object so inert. A heavy stone can be used to bludgeon someone to death, hammer nails into a shingle roof, or support the base of a retaining wall. Even the Martian potential for violence can be distinguished by purpose, whether it's used to defend, expand, avenge, compete, or excise a cancer.

If I'm going to cast a Talisman of Cultivation under Jupiter's influence, I mustn't shy away from the hard choices a regent must make under the influence of Mars. I'm embarking on an alchemical process implemented using natural magic. This alchemical process involves recognition and integration of cascading forces.

That which is above is like to that which is below, and that which is below is like to that which is above.

Talisman of Action

This talisman was made almost identically to the way I made the Talisman of Discipline. The difference is that now I know my ultimate goal is cultivation. Cultivation may require sacrifice like pruning a plant or prescribed burns of forests and fields. I'm now determined enough to act, wise enough to evaluate the possible outcomes, and brave enough to accept the consequences.

When I returned to the trail to gather natural ingredients I was inspired to craft the items into a tool. I knew I wanted a sharp rock and found that immediately. I then gathered a straight stick and a bamboo leaf. I bound the rock to the stick with the bamboo leaf to make a small tool. This is a bit outside the scope of "natural" magic, but I sensed a resonance between the capacity to craft tools, Promethean fire, and Martial frenzy. This makeshift ceremonial tool reflects the ambiguity between tools and weapons, both of which are instruments of "empire building."

Talisman of Action

lostianvs: AI-generated forest river. (Default)
Lessons of Mars

shadow face

My natural magic thesis project continues to unfold. The last object I made was a natural Talisman of Discipline. I conducted an astrological reading prior to the experiment that suggested the working would result in some kind of test. I believe that test has been proctored by our good neighbors.

Terror in the Night

The test started a few weeks ago, when I was woken up in the early hours of the morning with the sense of my impending death. I lay in bed, in the dark, unable to move due to terror. I felt the presence of someone standing over my bed. This presence was not spiritual or metaphorical. I genuinely felt that someone had physically broken in to my home, made their way to my bedroom, and was watching me sleep with ill intention. I've had experiences in the past with shadowy figures or dead relatives visiting me in the night, but this was completely different.

I'm not someone that frightens easily, but this situation had me genuinely concerned for my personal safety. I laid in bed motionless trying to come up with a plan to defend myself. I sleep with a machete next to my bed and a gifted competition sword not far out reach. Unfortunately, I had woken up on my stomach, so my back was completely exposed. I didn't know if I 
could react fast enough to defend myself against whomever was standing over my bed. I could not see them, nor did I know if they were armed. I couldn't even see whether the door to my bedroom was open to confirm whether I was imagining this whole situation. So, I just laid there. I made peace with my life and readied myself for death.

It never came. I eventually worked up the courage to move. No one was there. I checked the house and confirmed all the doors were still locked. I consulted with our home, ancestral, and landed spirits. They reported nothing unusual.

Conversations with the Cards

A few weeks went by and I forgot the incident. However, a dark cloud continued to hang over me. I was listening to a podcast recently that mentioned "demons standing over your bed at 3AM" and this triggered the memory of that terrifying night. I decided to follow up on this trigger with a series of tarot sessions. A loose transcript follows.

Query (Q): What's the source of this dark cloud?
Answer (A): You. You're marked.

Q: Is it related to the "demon" that visited me that night?
A: So to speak.

Q: Tell me about the demon. Where did it come from? Why did it come? Where did it go?
A: It came from a foreign land. It came to deliver a message. It died.

Q: How did it die?
A: As you've already surmised. (redacted)

Q: Foreign land? Did something follow me home from the ley line?
A: No.

Q: Something followed me home from the nexus?
A: Yes.

Q: Our good neighbors?
A: Yes.

Q: Why?
A: The well is running dry. They're unable to maintain their end of the bargain.

Q: What's missing?
A: Mars.

Q: I need to install Mars?
A: Yes.

Q: How?
A: You already have the means. Administer 7 strikes.

Returning to Foreign Soil

The next steps were clear. I needed to take the Talisman of Discipline to the good neighbors and stabilize the nexus. Previously, when I opened the nexus I had an intermediary spirit broker a deal for these visitors to act as a pseudo-Mars. It seems they were only able to maintain this configuration for a limited amount of time. I had over-estimated the resources available to this particular tribe of spirits. Back at home, I worked out a deal with the birds to lift this "mark" off of me and made preparations to return to the forest.

The journey to the tribal lands is long. In mundane time it takes only a few hours to go and come back, but there's no accounting for time while you're in there. It's like being in a place that's eternally at dusk. The trees are strange, the land is strange, and the animals are completely quiet. Even my senses become dulled, as if someone put cotton in my ears. There is only one way in (marked by a strange stone monolith) and one way out (through a series of dizzying switchbacks). All this is to say, I don't like going there.

Approaching the entrance, it became clear that something was wrong. The glamour that normally hides the entrance was weak. I used the charm of illumination to inspect the flow of power through the landscape. Things were moving, but not nearly as efficiently as they should be. I crossed the threshold and immediately took note of a flash of blue in my periphery. They knew I was here. I whispered, "Go tell your queen to expect me." A shadow darted over my head and disappeared into the forest.

At this point, I was getting tired. Just getting to the entrance is a long trek. I paused for a moment and used the charm of radiance to mitigate fatigue. Refreshed, I headed deeper into the forest.

Plumber for Hire

I eventually came to the bottom of a valley where two trees covered in wood ears flanked my path. For some reason, I knew this was a gate. I requested entry and received it. I approached the spring at the bottom of the valley and asked what the problem was.

The naiad of the spring was in extremely poor condition. They had nearly drained her dry. Inspecting the landscape, I could see some sort of blockage further up the valley. The blockage appeared accidental. I decided to install the Talisman of Discipline there. Outside the tribal lands, I picked up a heavy stone. I knew I would need something to "administer 7 strikes." Crouched over the blockage, I drove the Talisman into the ground by administering 7 strikes with the stone. I counted each strike by stating each planet in Chaldean order. I finished the operation by saying the charm of discipline and investing Mars into this side of the valley.

Looking down next to the stick I just drove into the ground, I saw two small rocks. On one rock, a common brown spider sat as if it was watching me. The other rock was leaning against the newly installed talisman. The other temples had been linked with the Sun by moving soil from their locations to a central location under the Sun's command. I collected the second small rock with this intention in mind.

Returning to court, I related what I had done and verified that the naiad had indeed been unrestrained. We said our goodbyes and I ascended the valley through the dizzying switchbacks. Unfortunately, the task was only halfway complete. Bringing this new Martian temple into orbit with the other temples would require that I invest this small rock into the pre-existing Solar temple.

Returning Home

I had no intention of taking a rock from the tribal lands back to my home. Though sunlight was fading at this point, I had no choice but to make my way to the Solar temple. At this point, it seemed appropriate to use the charms of inspiration and discretion for a little extra boost of spirit and to ensure that my journey was unimpaired. Transporting the piece of mars to the Solar temple was completed without incident. On my way out, the nexus seemed nicely in balance and I also confirmed that the glamour over the entrance to the tribal lands had been restored.

When I arrived at home, I realized that I had not divested myself of the heavy stone I used to "administer 7 strikes." It seems I've traded one talisman for another.

Ianvs
lostianvs: AI-generated forest river. (Default)
Meeting the Neighbors

dark forest

The forest is a diverse and storied environment. It's ripe with resources, but also fraught with hidden dangers. It's sometimes said that you can go your whole life without ever seeing a cougar, but if you spend enough time in the forest, one will have definitely seen you. We might consider ourselves lucky every time we avoid becoming a snack for the denizens of the forest.

First Encounter

On one of my usual treks into the forest, I stumbled upon the den of an entire tribe of "cougars." I had spent some time mapping out the natural fonts of power in the forest. All of these fonts contributed to a natural flow that gathered in the valley and concentrated in a small river. However, one location stuck out as odd. I felt no contribution from that direction and both people and some animals seemed to avoid it. I decided to investigate.

Almost immediately upon making off towards the strange location, I was attacked by fire ants. A minor nuisance at the time that I later came to understand was a warning. The journey to the location was strange and bewildering. Animal trails to seemed to snake and backtrack on themselves and the terrain was oddly flat where it should have been steep and steep where it should have been flat. It was eerily quiet both in mundane terms and ethereal.

After some time, I finally found myself in what appeared to be an ancient bowl-shaped landslide scar. The forest was thinner and allowed sunlight to filter in through the canopy. A small spring was bubbling up at the bottom of the bowl and was grown over with pigweed, purslane, and spurge. The spring was alive, but not fully aware as if it were drugged (in so far as a Naiad can be "drugged"). The area was beautiful, but also uncanny and uncomfortable. Across the site, I could see a series of switchbacks rising out of the valley. The first few meters of this path were lined with small mushrooms of every color imaginable.

Despite all the beauty, I felt an urgent need to leave this place. My other "eyes" could see a thick fog or smoke laid over the landscape. I decided to leave quickly and avoid inhaling too much of this fog.

Follow-up Reading

I decided to process what had happened using tarot. The reading indicated an itinerant tribe of spirits led by a stern queen with a fiery disposition. I was encouraged to leave them alone. I also consulted with some knowledgeable witches who had much the same advice. I took the warning and avoided approaching these "tribal lands" from then on.

Second Encounter

Some time later, I was called in to do some "service" work. An unfortunate young spirit had gotten stuck in the forest and was in pretty sore shape due to the application of broadcast herbicide. Nursing the spirit back to health was easy enough, but pulling him out of his predicament was another matter. I had already planned on opening the local nexus and this was when an idea presented itself. I would conduct 7/8ths of the work required to open the nexus. If the young spirit wanted his freedom, he would have to bargain with the fiery queen for the last 1/8th. The stuck spirit consented to my conditions and I conducted the work as previously described.

Of note, installing Saturn required me to pass by one of the entries to the tribal lands... or so I thought. What previously had been an entrance was now covered with a glamour of invisibility and inconspicuousness. I could also see several blue-cloaked figures in my periphery that were trailing me as I made my way towards the soon-to-be temple of Saturn.

I said nothing of these blue-cloaked spirits to my companion. I finished the operation and felt the nexus open without incident. Once we were clear of the forest, my companion turned to me and asked if I had seen the woman in the blue dress watching me perform the rite. I confirmed that I had and we agreed to never speak of our good neighbors again. Every now and then when I'm in the forest, I'll catch a flash of royal blue out of the corner of my eye or suddenly feel as if I'm under surveillance.

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lostianvs: AI-generated forest river. (Default)
Ianvs

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